The Quarantine Times, Last Issue of 2020
It is December 31, 2020. Marking this “year end” is arbitrary and very little is changing as we tear off yet another calendar page. May I remind future readers that we are still in COVID times out here in just-about-to-be 2021 and very little is under control.
Yes, yes, 2020 will be forever tagged as the dumpster fire and as the start of the many archetypal icons and memes, such as banana bread, toilet paper shortages, the politicization of the wearing of face masks, a new, videoconference-centric life, etc.
However, why NOT look back on this arduous, bizarre, yet curiously transformative last 12 months? Me, I got a LOT OF SHIT DONE and I’m proud of it.
I covered January-September 2020 in a blog post of mostly words here. I’ll stick some photos and captions in this one.
But first: yes, I am proud of being productive this year. I had a lot of forward motion punctuated by squealing emergency stops. Isolation, uncertainty, and looming depression would join forces to make me feel like I wasn’t going to see another day. Yet, here was another day, and another, and another. And so I trudged on, cajoling and tricking myself out of bed, into the shower, out of the house, up to my loft to work, onto the phone (“help me!”) until I could right myself and trudge on, but a little less wobbly-like.
I AM LUCKY. Though I am physically by myself, I am not alone. I am lucky to have the solid base on which to feel all these feelings. I am employed. I have been working hard on mental and spiritual transformation, so I have tools to cope. I am not responsible for others’ lives or livelihoods. I have loving and understanding friends and family. I am lucky, and know it.
I salute everyone, whether you got jack shit done, or accomplished everything. This is a really hard and humbling time and I have been paying attention to all the lessons being taught to me. I have never appreciated who I am and what I have more than in this moment.
These photos are mostly of organizational projects, since spiritual/mental transformation is a little harder to photograph. And although I went outside a fair amount and sometimes looked cute, selfies and landscape photography have not been priorities.
January: I don’t remember January.
My cousin died in February. I miss her.
My brother (in California for our cousin’s memorial) stayed with me a few days at the end of February. He escaped just a few days ahead of lock down. He was my last houseguest, and a good one – he helped me get a lot of projects knocked out, including repainting my kitchen. I have had a lot of time to admire this kitchen.
The spouse of a friend died and I attended my first online funeral in March. March 22 was also the last time I got to hang out with my friend C, who died suddenly in May. Her existence had an unfathomable impact on my life, as well as on countless others’.
About April was the time I realized that I needed to step up self-care – not in a spa treatment way, but more in a “get a therapist” way and other mind/brain improvement ways.
I also realized my incredible need to stay busy. I hate that I have used the “gift of time” while describing my lockdown to others, but the fact that I had almost limitless hours with literally no place to go spurred me into going deep. Honestly, I will not have time like this till after retirement, and I’m super glad every effing thing in my home now has an effing place. And that I unloaded a thrift store’s worth of crap into thrift stores. (I’m realizing these photos aren’t very remarkable, especially when they’re lacking before-and-after comparisons, but OMG so many many hour hours hours of work are represented here)
Happy new year, whatever that means.
Happy New Year, Becky! I can already feel that is going to be GOOD ONE! Much love from Seattle. ??
Happy New Year, Becky! Very much enjoyed this post.
Thank you Becky for baring your soul here and showing pix. I’m a sucker for both. You’ve inspired me to think and move forward. I’m trying, the alternative is bitch otherwise, ain’t it? Peace and Love, my friend. ??&??