why do you flip and give me a skip each time

I am trying to break up this Mexican standoff in my brain. On one side, my desire to trumpet my new blog design holds me to the rock; on the other, my need to acknowledge a significant (and very sad) anniversary holds me to the hard place.

So, for now, output apropos of nothing and of everything.

I took a CPR class today. I was surprised by the changes made in the two-plus decades since I last received training. Not the least of which was the fact that I now know how to operate an AED (automated external defibrillator). As in: electrode pads, beep beep, “clear!”, shock. As you might have noticed, AED units are in the airports, gyms, schools — they’re the Speak N’ Spell-looking things. Pretty soon, they’ll be everywhere, right next to the fire extinguisher, and we will all remember to call it an AED (and not the heart-shock-paddle-thingy).

Anyway. Until today, I have struggled with a gigantic “what if”. My mother died of cardiac arrest five years ago. She was at home. She did not receive CPR until after the paramedics arrived, far far too late. I was haunted (not literally! thanks, mom) by thoughts of “if only I knew CPR and happened to be there and knew exactly what to do and the paramedics got there supersoon and and and…”

But the reality, confirmed by grief counselors and medical professionals, is that CPR can’t do a huge amount on its own. CPR can’t restart a stopped heart — it’s a method to buy a tiny bit of time until defibrillation can occur. Because of the circumstances, my mom didn’t have a chance. And that is what it is.

Readier availability of AEDs greatly increases the chances of undeading the dead (you know what I mean). Someday, we’ll all be carrying them around on our keychains and reanimating folks all over the damn place.

For some reason, this all makes me feel better about the mom scenario. I’m really glad I’m starting the new year with this new skill. And I hope that I never have to use it.

Oh, by the way, if you die near me, I’ll know what to do. However, my work did not pay for the first aid training, so please — if you are alive but injured, find some other good samaritan to help you.

photo: kiss me, originally uploaded by hambox

American Heart Association website