source of the suckiness

Violet can’t believe I made sucky Seder desserts. Oh HO honey.

Passover desserts generally should be without dairy and unleavened. Keep that in mind.

The Strawberry Brown Betty thing was, in essence, a strawberry cobbler but I completely screwed up the water amount while stewing the berries, and also I attempted a crumble made of matzoh, which was a bad, bad idea. The final result: the taste of a fruit rollup studded with styrofoam. Gluey yet rubbery. Trust me, even my “I’ll eat anything!” Elderly Relative left it alone.

The Chocolate Brownie thing was really, really leaden and gave the effect of a Tootsie Roll crossed with unbaked chocolate cake batter, but in solid brick form.

However, overnight it got a little better and I cut very small pieces of it and served it with sorbet and it was sort of passable. But not great.

My superhuman brother-in-law (the incredibly industrious one) came to my rescue and, drawing from his bakey Pennsylvanian Dutch roots, oversaw the completion of a huge and gorgeous apple pie. Owing to a couple mistakes on my part (because the destiny of Becky’s Passover 2011 is code-word: DOOMED) it wasn’t perfect.

Note to future self:

  1. Stop bragging about your Kosher dessert-making ability.
  2. If you do make another attempt at Seder sweets, call your hosts and find out what they require/do not require, ingredients-wise. In this case, they were fine with butter, which would have helped the dessert creation quite a bit.
  3. Check expiration dates of things.
  4. Give yourself enough prep time and double check your driving directions, so not to be painfully late.
  5. Bring lots of sorbet and encourage liberal daubing, to cover up less-than-lovely dessert offerings.
  6. Dress nicely and make good conversation, to cover up less-than-lovely dessert offerings.

1 Comments

  1. Carol on April 21, 2011 at 10:05 am

    Was feelin’ your pain until the “check expiration dates” which ever so slightly triggered my gag reflex.

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