Archive for November 2007
Heap high the board with plenteous cheer
An email, in its entirety, from my old roommate Scott: Just wanted to say Happy Thanksgiving! Eat like a pig!!! Ooooh yeah. I staggered a little, walking to my apartment tonight, so distracted was I by the little animated roasted turkeys circling my skull like a greasy crown of deliciousness. I have managed to wangle…
Read Morecomprehension of the conundrum of Danish contentment
Drinking for Denmark, originally uploaded by flickruser viralbus. Thanks for letting me use it! My fatherland, Denmark, has been on my mind. Since yesterday’s Danish breakfast, at least. As a typical American Mutt, I glom, half-seriously, onto the bloodline that runs purest in my veins: the land of Dogme 95, Victor Borge, and a whole…
Read Morebeep beep mm beep beep
On my way to some mischief to the north last night, I stop at a convenience store for refreshments. I bring my Gatorade to the front counter employee named Kevin. Kevin: Will that be all? Becky: Do you have any Mentos? Kevin: No. Becky: Gasp! Really? Kevin: Do you want to kill me? Becky: Do…
Read Morecutting the dead wood
Imagine, if you will, the over-pop-cultured scene in the movie Network*, when Peter Finch’s character exhorts his television viewers to open their windows and shout “I’m as mad as hell and I’m not going to take this anymore!” Now, imagine a tiny, furry Cute Overload critter stamping its little feet and opening a precious miniature…
Read Moresunshine in the rain it’s so strange
In the wee early years of the 1980s, in a record store, I stumbled upon Japanese pop band The Plastics. My world changed. Then I saw “Top Secret Man” on SCTV and my world changed even more. I’m not kidding — I looked, acted, felt and thought differently after understanding there were people like The…
Read Morehalf empty glass
Halfway point of the NaBloShutTheFuckUpMo. Ugh. I feel that a Real Writer should rise up out of me at this point — the Becky-skin zips away to reveal a betweeded typewriting virtuoso, hornrims and pipe clamped onto the face, while art — finally, art — starts appearing on this page. Sorry to disappoint you. All…
Read Morein good hands: mechanic
Another salute to one of the many people that keep the Hambox Empire going. As I broadcast to every human in the world within earshot: I have a long, hard commute. I’ve already put an unspeakable amount of miles on my new (to me) car, and recently, my braking ability became somewhat squishy and definitely…
Read Morenot to be confused with mie and kei
I avoided apples for a good portion of my adult life. Too many disappointments. Biting into yet another mealy Red Delicious was like kissing another damn frog or scratching another losing ticket or contracting yet another venereal disease (j/k!) But these days, I have clamored back up on that apple bandwagon, elbowing a spot between…
Read Moreveteran’s day quiz
I love accents! If I had do-overs, I might choose to become a linguist (the most cunning of all). ANYway. I had Californian parents and have lived here a majority of my life. So, I guess my speech patterns and accent are generally* associated with “The Westâ€, or “the lowest common denominator of American speech 
Read Morewannabe
Photo of and uploaded by Elyse Sewell. Thanks for letting me use it! I’m generally quite content with the places I’ve gone and the things I’ve accomplished. And the people I’ve done. You know what I mean. I generally don’t yearn to go back in time, or ask for a do-over, or burn with envy…
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