I have an email that is lurking in my inbox and just the sight of it there gives me mild agita. It’s not a horrible letter, nor earth-shattering news — just a little e-thorn in my i-side. A gnat-sized bête noire. A summer cold. A paper cut. You get the picture.

I have decided not to take any action on this email, the information it contains, or the sender. But I would like to dwell unhappily on its contents just a bit longer before releasing it, like a toxic butterfly, into the ashy air.

Since I’m a really good dweller, that is the easy part. The hard part is letting it go when I have probed and poked and prodded it enough.

Therefore, I am giving myself a time limit for thinking about this email. I will dwell for as long as it appears on the first page of my inbox in my webmail program. As soon as it disappears to page 2, it has disappeared from my life. Poof!

I only need to receive 13 emails (not including spam) before this happens. If you want to nudge this along, leave a comment — I get notifications via email! Or, if you would like me to continue to suffer, then, by all means, remain silent.

Update: Uh oh, thanks to your efforts (only 5 emails to go!), I’m needing to dwell on that email really fast…

Fucker. Why the fuck would someone write that? Asshole. What a stupid email.

UpdateII: Okey doke! It’s gone. Outta sight, outta mind. Thanks, everyone, for your most entertaining comments and email. You, my world is rocked by.