Professor Genghis Whitehead and his colleague Ursula Crakunschtuff were close to perfecting their major opus — a formula that enabled the consumer to be a “fly on the wall” inside someone’s mind — reading their thoughts and controlling their actions.

Finally, a tweak here and there, and it was done. Before thinking about it too much, Genghis consumed the formula. It worked! His first order of mind control was to get inside Ursula’s head and force her to perform dance moves from the 1960s.

The perfection of the formula is what Ursula had been waiting for — their plans for world domination were one step closer. They could control millions! They could be rich! Privately, Genghis began having second thoughts about using the formula for evil.

There was a knock at the door. Sharon, a young ingenue from an extremely dim-witted family, had come to the laboratory to answer the “help wanted” ad for new lab assistant. This is how Ursula came to find out she herself had been fired. She vowed to get revenge, before she was dragged by security from the office.

Genghis, immediately smitten with Sharon, took another dose of formula and got into her head. Sharon was horrified and fled. Meanwhile, Ursula, completely unhinged, sang her own praises before heading to Sharon’s hometown, to enlist support from Sharon’s parents to get her to quit the lab.

Sharon collected her thoughts at a local park. A young man was sitting nearby and introduced himself as Bill. Bill was also able to read Sharon’s thoughts! They sang “Get Your Mind Out of my Head” before Sharon fled — again.

Ursula Crakunschtuff made it to Sharon’s parent’s house. As she described the situation Sharon was in, Wilhem (Sharon’s father) recognized Ursula — she was of the Krakow Crakunscthuffs! They were an infamous Polish family known for creating deeply traumatizing science experiments in their neighborhood.

Back at the lab, the love between Genghis and Sharon was inevitable, and growing. As Sharon sung the praises of the formula as something with potential to heal the world, Genghis forced himself not to use it for nefarious purposes, as he realized he needed to be a good person to earn Sharon’s love.

At this point, Bill, Ursula, and Sharon’s parents converged on the laboratory. Genghis revealed in a shocking twist, that Bill was his son, and that Bill’s telepathy was due to Genghis’s earlier experiments with earlier versions of the formula.

Once all was explained, Sharon and Genghis were free to be in love, Ursula was thwarted, and all was well.

– – – – –

This is the plot to last weekend’s improv show. The format is called Spontaneous Broadway. Each of six improv performers make up a short scene and song on the spot based on titles provided by the audience. The audience then votes for their favorite scene/song. In the second half of the show, the improvisers present a 40-minute, Broadway-style musical based on that song.

This was my setup. The musical was called “Space Time Continuum,” and the song was “Get Your Mind Out of my Head.” The audience voted on it, so we fleshed it out to the interesting, albeit imperfect, plot that is recapped above. I played Ursula. It was pretty fun, and the audience really loved it — we got a standing ovation. Usually, what we create onstage gets forgotten pretty quickly (such is the ephemeral nature of improv), so this is a little record of a night to remember.