Diary Entry: December 13, Age 14
As part of my Advent Calendar project, I am presenting excerpts from my actual teenage diaries!
The best time I’ve had on Christmas was when I was very young. Now, I just participate but there’s a lot more spectating. I wasn’t all filled with that happy anticipation. But that’s growing up, I suppose. I’m going to enjoy Christmas in a different way now.
Wow, this is so sad to hear at 14. I still am full of anticipation. I KNOW SANTA IS COMMING THIS YEAR!!
I remember when I got that same feeling – kind of a loss, wasn’t it? It later occurred to me that it happened when I started to get obligations and responsibilities myself. I had to do chores, buy gifts, couldn’t just hang and look and enjoy anymore! I don’t know, but I think that’s when I lost the childhood happy anticipation. As you know, X-mas will be kind of different and strange this year, and I’ve had to think about it in a different way. I’ve concluded that it’s as commercial and stressful as I let it be. I’m in charge! So the careless feeling is actually coming back in a small way 🙂
I’m with Ã…sta. As an adult, one of my bestestest xmases was at Sea Ranch. We went up a week before (dodging commercial madness in the city), stayed in a lovely cabin, prepared scrumptious meals, foraged for mushrooms, tidepooled… I believe you’ve been to Sea Ranch, so you know how magical a place it is. (Especially the chapel!) Truly care-free.
Damn, now I wanna go to Sea Ranch.
Oh Branden, I did not mean to imply that Santa doesn’t exist .. he TOTALLY DOES {shifty eyes} ..really he does.
“Carefree” is an excellent word to focus on for the holidays. Even though I’ve been more Christmassy than I have been in years, I’m still keeping it dialed waaaaaaay down. I also have a new appreciation for all the grownups in my life that worked so hard to keep those Christmases magical for so long.
Spending the holidays with someone who really gets into the whole thing can bring some of that magic back….