I love talking birds, so weirdly wonderful. My parent’s friends had a Mynah bird named Hector. He could laugh, meow, and imitate the flushing toilet. He could say “my name is Hector” and “you aaaaare…”. About that second one: apparently the family tried to teach him to say “you are drunk” but he could only get the first two words. I can still hear Hector’s voice and intonation, and his bright eyes with ever-adjusting pupils. Great bird.

Thank god for YouTube, the outpost for more talking bird videos than you will ever need.

“I can talk, can you fly?” [direct link]

Why don’t I own an animal that can say “wheeeeee!”? [direct link]

Mitso would make an excellent character study for a Scorsese film. [direct link]

My parent’s other friends had a gigantic, mean parrot who couldn’t say anything, and also bit the housekeeper’s fingertip off. That bird was no fun at all.