Read first:

• Inspirational Dance Movie Intended for Teenagers: Part 1
• Inspirational Dance Movie Intended for Teenagers: Part 2
• Inspirational Dance Movie Intended for Teenagers: Part 3

PART FOUR: BONUS SOUNDTRACK SINGLES!

David’s Song:

Dance Movie Club Single
By Scary Name and Name That White People Over Forty Can’t Pronounce

Listen to me!
Listen to me!

I have an important message that I have to tell you.

I am going to pretend that you are connected to me by referring to you by a disparaging word for my own race.

This message is important because it involves the buttocks of women.

I have a strong opinion about what women should do with their butts.

Especially when they are on the dance floor, there is a certain thing that women should do with their butts.

It is an up and down motion simulating sex. I will now suggest a metaphor for this motion.

Perhaps it will involve a child’s ball or a food product. Has anyone used Jello in a song yet?

Rap Break by Name That White People Over Forty Can’t Pronounce

I am getting paid a lot to say just a few lines in this song.I am going to mention a piece of consumer culture that is presently current, but will date this song terribly in less than a year.iPhone.I also have strong opinions about what women should do with their butts. But, I am also concerned with their size.When women are on the dance floor, I enjoy it when women with large butts are moving in a provocative manner.I like a rutting motion. Back to the song now while I cash my large check.

Have you started moving your butt correctly yet?

Well, you should. Especially if you ever want to get with me.

I am going to suggest that all men like this, but provide no evidence that this is true.

If you aren’t already on the dance floor, I beseech you to start dancing. No, I demand it.

I reassert my strong opinion about what women should do with their butts while they dance.

Then I say something really hateful about women only wanting money.

It’s probably to cover up my hidden gay feelings or sexual insecurities. What women would actually want to love me?

I don’t really like women, but I have to state an opinion about their bodies to maintain my image.

So, in conclusion.

1. Go out on the dance floor.
2. Move your butt up and down with a grinding motion
3. Buy my next single which I advertise in the final line.

 

Becky’s Song:

Less-Popular Dance Movie Club Single
By Attractive Female with One Name

I’ve got an outstanding physical characteristic
That attracts males

The aforementioned characteristic
Is superior to any other.

I taunt and threaten other females
So that they stay away from whom I perceive to be “my” males

I’ve got other excellent personal characteristics
I will name them now [list::insert]

[include earworm-inducing hook, consisting of cheerleader-style chanting, a repetitive nonsense rhyme, and the reuse of short portions of previously-produced sound recordings]

Here are some brands of accessories and clothing that I enjoy wearing
And the alcoholic beverages that I consume

In order to be in my general vicinity of me
It is imperative that you are in a high socio-economic bracket

Now I will repeat the hook over and over so that everyone, including white people over 40, will have no choice but to hear the hook in their heads for months, if not years.

We are glad that you paid to see Inspirational Dance Movie Intended for Teenagers. The sequel, which will be very similar to the plot of this one, will be out in theaters the next major holiday.