lessons: drink warm drinks, buy stronger pretzels

Three things (two oddly pretzel-related) that prove that (in the words of my departed friend Turquoise) I AM DUM.

Because I am running around a lot, and live in a region that promotes this lifestyle, I eat a lot of hand food to go. I am not proud of this; at least I endeavor to avoid fast food grease nightmares.

I recently purchased a “high protein” sourdough pretzel from a Big Juice franchise store and hopped in my car. I managed to drive with pretzel in one hand, not easy to do when operating a stick shift. I stopped at the drive-thru pharmacy to pick up my Elderly Relative’s glaucoma medication. As I reached for the bag of drugs from the outstretched pharmacist’s hand, I managed to fling my pretzel out of the window and into the side wall of the pharmacy. Not a bite had been taken.

This past week I stopped by Target for some decorative hand towels to be used for staging our home for sale (yes! this is my life!). On the way out I stopped at the small food area and purchased — yes — a pretzel. This one had no pretenses of being anything remotely healthy, but I was in a hurry to get to a workshop and figured it was better than a hot dog. As I rifled in my bag for my car keys, the pretzel, fragile due to its starchy weight, broke and fell upon the ground near the exit door. Not a bite had been taken.

In the past few days, to impress my impending Sunday party guests, I have been using an ice tray that cleverly makes ice in large, spherical shapes. Because the tray only makes three spheres at a time, I have been painstakingly creating then saving the ice in a large Ziploc bag. Last night, I noticed with satisfaction I had amassed about 20 in the bag, and prepared another tray for another round.

This morning I came into the kitchen to discover a large Ziploc bag of water sitting on the counter.

1 Comments

  1. Jeana on July 19, 2013 at 6:00 pm

    Oh, man! I do stuff like that ALL. THE. TIME. DUM high five across the internet.

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